Posted by pitasassy on February 02, 2003 at 20:39:40:
genrel pita calls hims crack troops to attintshun (da udder ones two).
kits iy haffs to tells youse uf a bery bery mean and nasty humin. it seems dis worfless peece uf waste was usin a smogoinmobile to play around on da udder nite in the matanuska valley. well hims came upon a farm dat rayzes reindeer fur dems meets (likes mostus people do cows)and a few fur shows like a kitsmas pagents and stuff. well sum uf the show aminals the owner keeps in a pen necks to hims house. well dis snogoinmobilin idjit was out early early mornin (abouts 4-5 am) and took to shootin the show reindeer (and towards da owners house), hims fired seberal shots then tookeded off. well then a bit later hims came back and dids it agin. da owner took affer hims and sews dids policemen. now hims was caut today (a fwiend turneded hims in). 4 uf the luffly show deer were killed or so bad thems had to be helpeded to the bridge....includin a bootiful doe named 'merry christmas' who was wiff baby. now dis worfless humin deserffs to be bombededd sews iy is callin fur all aif furrs members to reddy youse plains furr a bombin raid on tooseday, and all ground twoops to surrounds and contains hims and well as usin da bazzooookka on hims. mamu force may beeze needed.
now our unnerwater forces and honor guard members will be eggscuzed. iy woods likes them to makes shures youse is eggstra spiffy as iy is assigning youse to act as our representatives at the meowmorial serbices fur the bwave shuttle astronots.
dat is all
majer genrel pita
ober and outs
